By Dr Albert Lim Kok Hooi

I AM planning to politely turn down most invitations for Chinese wedding dinners. There is nothing wrong with such joyous celebrations. And certainly it is not that I have misgivings about the food and festivities. It is me. I don't want to embarrass my hosts any more.

I am punctual to a fault. I am timely in accomplishing my tasks. I pay my bills ahead of time. Procrastination is not in my vocabulary. I don't mean it as a boast. And, honestly, I don't know how it all came about. It could not be that I was born punctual. Who ever heard of a "punctual gene?" It might be the way I was brought up.

But, as far as I can tell, there was nothing special or spectacular in my infant and childhood environment. I just can't help being on time.

Because most people around me were not punctual, I thought that my being punctual was a manifestation of an obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). That was until I visited Germany, Switzerland, and Japan in my early 30s. Most of the population of these countries are punctual. Surely it cannot be that the majority of all three nations are afflicted with OCD.

Being punctual comes naturally to me. I don't even try. Serious. Neither am I trying to prove anything. I read the invitation card and it says dinner starts at 7.00pm. I am at the restaurant at 6.50 pm. The bride and groom are not there. Neither are their parents. Even the restaurant manager and wedding coordinator are nowhere to be seen.

I don't mind. I settle down quietly to read The Enchantress of Florence by Salman Rushdie. It is a good read and I am absorbed. At 7.30pm, the hosts arrive and effusively apologise to me for not being there when I came. They feel embarrassed. I say, "It's no big deal". At 9.30pm, dinner starts. I have finished my novel.

In Kuala Lumpur, I give myself one hour to get from point A to point B if I drive. One and a half hours on a Friday evening and two hours on a rainy Friday evening during the fasting month. As such, I am almost never late for appointments. Unless there is a freak three-hour traffic jam. This happens about three times a year. Almost inevitably, I turn up on time for a dinner, meeting, lecture, or concert.

When I arrive early (sometimes way, way before the event begins), I read. With so much reading under my belt, I hope to be nominated to the panel of judges for the Man Booker prize soon.

Not only do I embarrass the hosts of wedding dinners, I also embarrass the chairman of meetings when I am an attendee. I am there 10 minutes before the scheduled time. The chairman is often late. I also embarrass some meeting attendees when I take the chair. I am there 20 minutes earlier then the scheduled start time. I go through (once again) the minutes of the previous meeting. Attendees trickle in. Most are late. Some murmur a sheepish, muffled apology. Some walk in brazenly without any compunction.

I now want you to imagine a world where almost no one is late. For work, meetings, dinners, concerts, and even a romantic assignation. Where trains and buses depart and arrive on time. Where there is a time to start a meeting and a time to finish it and both are observed.

There is such a world. I mentioned Japan, Germany, and Switzerland. There is more. Most of northwest Europe and Scandinavia. Large swaths of North America. Australia, and New Zealand are not far behind. Urban, cosmopolitan East Asia is catching up.

I have always wondered about the reasons for impunctuality and I have arrived at a few hypotheses. The first is neo-Feudalism. In other words, a false sense of superiority. The most important person in a gathering is entitled to make everyone else wait. The corollary is equally true. We feel embarrassed to be early. It may mean we are greedy (for the food), have too much time on our hands ("busy people are important people") or are hard up. All three are a big no, no, no.

The second reason for being late is a lack of planning. Planning is not cool whereas spontaneity is. Underlings plan and bosses are fashionably late.

The third reason why we are late is that we take on too much. Our plate is already full; yet we pile on more commitments. To me, it is better to make 10 promises and keep nine of them than make a 100 and keep eight.

The odd thing is that most people who bemoan tardiness are not punctual themselves. It is akin to driving and human rights. Bad drivers and human rights violators are the first to say they drive well and respect the rights of others.

I am making a plea to doctors, patients, and society at large to be punctual, organised and not procrastinate. If you are all three, you get more out of each day. More work done and more time to enjoy your leisure activities. You and others around you will feel less stressed. You will accomplish most of what you set out to do.

Patients, already suffering, uncomfortable, and in pain, should not be made to wait for hours to see a doctor. Some doctors give appointment times (9.25, 10.10, 11.35) for patients and see them at such times. Patients who have such doctors should make it a point not to be late. Their doctor is one in 10,000.

Punctuality is an indicator of a successful people and a developed nation. It is the hallmark of kings. Most importantly, it is all about self-respect and respect for others.

It is about time we keep to time all the time.

Dr Albert Lim Kok Hooi is a consultant oncologist. For further information, e-mail starhealth@thestar.com.my.

-The Star/Asia News Network