An unhappy rocking horse became an alter-ego of sorts for children's book author Emily Lim.

The 36-year-old author suffers from a rare voice disorder (spasmodic dysphonia) which causes her voice to tremble involuntarily. And she confesses that she identifies with Rusty Horse, the main character in her new book The Tale Of Rusty Horse.

'It was a story I struggled very hard with. I see myself in Rusty, because after I developed the voice disorder, I became very concerned with how people looked at me, even strangers. I kept dwelling on the what-ifs,' says Lim, who has been married for nearly 10 years to a banking executive.

Rusty is a rocking horse who yearns to be loved. Once a favourite with children in the toy store, his popularity wanes when they discover a real horse in the nearby stables.

When Rusty finally gets the chance to be a real horse, he gives it up for a boy who loves to ride on him, fearing that if he went to the stables, his friend would be left alone.

'Rusty finally found peace, and his place in the world, and that pretty much describes the point I am at right now. I've learnt not to look back,' says Lim, who was diagnosed with the disorder in 1998.

The book was also a turning point for her: The former corporate director of business development for Raffles Holdings decided to become a full-time author after she finished Rusty's story.

Having been on a sabbatical since the end of 2005, she had originally intended to return to the corporate world at the end of this year.

There will be a reading and book signing session at Great World City, (entrance of Food Junction) next Saturday at 1pm and Aug 2 at 2pm.

She changed her mind after spending time at Tung Ling Bible College where she is currently enrolled in a three-month Bible study course.

She adds that receiving feedback from her young readers also gives her encouragement and joy.

She was especially touched when her seven- year-old niece Annabel said that her favourite part of the story was when Rusty decided to give up being a real horse in order to be with his friend.

Lim says: 'She told me, 'When I had a tiff with a friend at school, I felt lonely and sad, and so I know what the little boy would feel if he didn't have Rusty,' and that touched me, because I felt my book could reach out to people and touch lives, which has been my hope.'

The author's first book, Prince Bear And Pauper Bear, published late last year, was awarded the Bronze medal in the Children's Picture Book category in the 2008 Independent Publisher Book Award, which recognises excellence in independent publishing.

Both her books were published under her own imprint, Mustard Seed Books. She says the writing and publishing process 'have given her more voice'.

She has already completed the first draft of her next book, which she describes as 'a joyful story about finding your identity'.

The Tale Of Rusty Horse is available at major bookstores at $20 (with GST).

This article was first published in The Sunday Times on July 20, 2008.