MEN are not the only ones playing the cheating game on their spouses.

The number of wives having affairs has been rising over the last five years, lawyers and private investigators (PIs) told The Sunday Times.

These married women are usually career high-fliers in their 30s. Many travel often as part of their job, and usually get entangled with their bosses or colleagues.

More husbands are also divorcing their adulterous wives.

Lawyer Amolat Singh said he used to get only two cases a year of husbands divorcing their cheating wives but last year, he saw seven such cases.

Some husbands have resorted to installing spyware on their wives' computers to track their e-mail and messages, he said.

Lawyer Koh Tien Hua noted: 'Couples now spend a lot of time apart and this increases the opportunities and inclinations for affairs.'

Half of his clients seeking divorces are now men, when it was 40 per cent previously.

Singapore saw an all-time high of 7,061 divorces in 2006, up from 6,909 in 2005 and 6,388 in 2004.

LJ Investigation & Consultancy Services said the number of men requesting checks on their wives has jumped by 45 per cent. Its director, Mr Lionel De Souza, said: 'Today, men can cheat, so can the women.'

Mr Vincent Tan, director of Commercial Investigations LLP, said: 'A lot of the women travel or are posted overseas and many get involved with third parties.'

Each month, his firm takes on about 15 cases that involve matrimonial checks. Women used to be the ones hiring his PIs, but in the past five years, many men have asked for checks on their wives.

Mr Samuel Ng, executive consultant of Marine Parade Family Service Centre, said men take a longer time to 'heal' when cheated on.

'It's a major tsunami to their self-esteem and also pride,' he said.

A mother leaving the family would also be a big blow to the children involved. He said: 'If the mum was the main caregiver of the children, they would be greatly impacted.'

Association of Women for Action and Research president Constance Singam said current marriages are weakening because of the 'modern situation'.

She added that the trend is not specific to Singapore but occurs in developed cities where women are now financially independent.

'Both parties are working, are stressed out; they want to work harder at the relationship but they are too tired to,' she said.

This article was first published in The Sunday Times on Feb 24 2008.