No one could say they knew for sure as to why Chulalongkorn Univeristy student, Chaninard Rungtivasuwan jumped to her death. The sense of loss is so enormous. Our heart aches just thinking about it. By any standards, Chaninard was a good student. A sound academic track record with good grade points average at a leading institution. Any parents in their right mind would have been proud. But what appeared to be a success story ended in a tragedy.

While we probably could never come up with a satisfactory answer as to why Chaninard took her own life, the fact that an alarming number of students have chosen or just think about choosing this path should be a great concern to us all.

While every death has its own story, one common denominator that links all of them together is that these students possessed the fear of failure. To some this fear of failure was so great that it led them to take their own lives.

And while we are bogged down with our efforts to get to the bottom as to why each of these victims decided to commit suicide, perhaps we need to go back a little further and examine how we guide our young and the kind of benchmark we set for them.

For too long we have taught our children that success is the key to the good life. And failure is a bad thing. We tend to forget that failure can be glorious too. The wounds and bruises from falling off our first attempt in riding a bicycle are themselves signs of "success" - that we learn how to get up and start again.

There has been too great a demand for excellence. We tell our children that good things will come their way if they succeed.

We don't tell them that there is more to life than getting good grades. In other words, our education system doesn't teach failure; it only focuses on success.

The media too perpetuates these success stories, putting the so-called victors on a pedestal as if this is the only thing that counts in life.

While it is understandable that to strive towards excellence should be the major goal for our education system, it is the duty of the family, as well as the social environment we created, to strike the balance between what is expected in the classroom and what is expected in life.

If the death of Chaninard tells us anything, it is that parental guidance and the education system must go hand in hand. It is common for urban parents nowadays to work from dusk 'til dawn and dawn 'til dusk and expect their children to lead an ordinary life.

And instead of setting a rigid benchmark for future generations, perhaps we have to stress creative thinking and teach our young and old to learn to embrace failure.

Thomas Edison, a great scientist known for his inspiration, once said: "I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward."

We teach our young people that if they work hard enough they can get whatever they want. But is that enough - living by want alone?

Too many walls are decorated with diplomas and shelves laden with trophies. But instead of using this as the sole benchmark for one's life, how about telling our children how to handle those small moments of integrity and compassion that they will come across during their lifetime.

We don't need a GPA to measure the significance of our lives. We can start with valuing the people around us.