Fulfilling expectations of others

SOCIETY demands that we get good grades, get good jobs, lead good lives.

We are being forced into courses we don't like, such as law, economics or medicine, just because it's a 'good' course that can score us a 'good' job when we graduate.

How can we ever be happy if we're doing things we don't like?

I didn't like mugging for exams. I just wanted to have fun.

But I was forced to study because my parents wanted me to get the grades to 'get ahead in life'.

Since it's almost impossible to change their mindsets, or that of society, my peers and I can only hope to fill our lives with 'happy' activities, which explains the endless co-curricular activities, late-night clubbing and gaming.

But at the end of the day, we will have spent two, three, even five years of our lives merely fulfilling the expectations of others.

Ng Yi Xun, 19, is currently serving national service

Cliches, but they bring happiness

CONTRARY to popular opinion, you can be happy even if you are swamped with work. Some of the most cheery and contented people I know are going through what is the most gruelling year of their lives so far - the second year of junior college.

They work themselves to the bone, forgoing sleep for studying, sports and co-curricular commitments. Yet they stay upbeat.

How do they do it? They draw joy by appreciating what they have, such as family and friends. They are passionate about what they do and this allows them to smile under pressure.

These are things that can be dismissed as cliched or easily forgotten, but it is foremost in their mindsets. I respect them for it.

To be able to fulfil all your commitments is one thing. To be able to do that happily is a quality well worth one's admiration.

Bryan Toh, 16, is a first-year mass communications student at Ngee Ann Polytechnic

Making the wrong connections

WE ARE connected to the point of over-connection.

I'm no Luddite, but I think that our obsession with technology - MSN, Facebook, e-mail - is seriously getting out of hand.

Many of us have now developed a short attention span and a low tolerance for anything that requires patience.

A nasty side effect is the loss of the personal touch, the human connection which is so crucial to true happiness. Our gadgets and online accounts provide us, at most, with short-lived amusement.

It is time to get back to basics. I've resolved not to surrender to the impulse to e-mail a former classmate when I could arrange a lunch appointment and meet him or her face to face.

And I'm not going to join a charity group on Facebook just to pretend that I'm doing a good deed when I could instead organise welfare visits to charities to actually affect the lives of people in need.

This way, I will not only be giving joy to others and actually feel that I am making a difference in the lives of others - I will also gain lasting happiness.

Ow Yeong Wai Kit, 20, has a place to read arts and social sciences at the National University of Singapore

Home is where unhappiness is

WE ARE unhappy because of a lack of familial love and compassion.

The only time I do feel a little happiness is when I'm out of the house doing something I like - for example, playing music, shopping and hanging out with my friends.

Home is where the root of all problems is - typical problems between parents who don't understand their 'rebellious' children, and sibling rivalry.

In my case, my parents and I have never seen eye to eye. We disagree and quarrel over really small things.

For instance, my mum is always disagreeing with me about not being at home all the time. She doesn't understand that I can't stand being cooped up at home.

What am I to do other than lock myself up in my room and make friends with my laptop and books?

My siblings are also a nuisance to me. They love playing the 'blame-everything-on-Jannah' game. We are always fighting, verbally or physically.

For these reasons, I don't exactly like being at home.

I am at least glad that I have an awesome bunch of friends to make up for all of it and give myself a little happiness.

Nurul Jannah, 19, is a third-year media and communications student at Singapore Polytechnic

This article was first published in The Straits Times.