Please remain calm but I have some alarming news.
Even as you are reading this, aliens are invading our planet. They do not appear to be peaceful and have already caused significant devastation on an unsuspecting population.
The Government is aware but has chosen not to alarm the public. They (the aliens, not the Government) have disguised themselves in humanoid form and currently go by the name One Direction.
Chances are, many of you who have read the first few sentences would have just assumed I was being facetious.
"Aliens attacking? That's rich," you said to yourself. "Did they travel at the speed of light or discover technology required to make a wormhole through time and space fabric?"
But there is also a small group of you who now have your tin-foil hats on and have retreated to your panic room.
You know about those One Direction aliens. You tried to warn people but they wouldn't listen (to you, not One Direction).
I am writing about aliens and conspiracies today in light of a new poll conducted by CNN asking thousands of Americans what they think happened to the missing Malaysia Airlines flight MH370.
The poll is fascinating not just because it includes "aliens" as one possible explanation but also that about one in 10 people believe that beings from another planet or dimension had something to do with it.
As I read that finding, my first instinct was to roll my eyes at the people who backed the alien theory.
Can I also say I have always considered it strange that people who have been abducted by aliens claim that the beings conducted experiments on them via the back door.
Why would a superior being do this? Do they not have an X-ray machine?
But then I decided to pause in my mockery for a moment to think about why so many people seem to believe the unbelievable.
I mean, the story of aliens and MH370 is by no means the only far-fetched story backed by sincere, intelligent people. There are conspiracy theories about a whole range of unsolved mysteries.
Some believe that the 9/11 terrorist attacks were a ploy by the US government to justify an invasion of Iraq; Elvis is still alive; Paul McCartney is dead; the original moon landing was all special effects; and that Nasa occasionally kidnaps people and convinces them they were abducted by aliens so that they can continue to get funding for space research.
There is good evidence available to show that none of this is true but people still believe it.
Why? My guess is that this willingness to believe anything stems from an unwillingness to believe everything.