Football: Silly seasons goes on, thanks to di Canio

Football: Silly seasons goes on, thanks to di Canio

The Premier League took a break for international matches but football's silly season just never stops for anything.

In fact, it piles up like language problems for Paolo di Canio. When the Italian comedian became the manager of Sunderland, he was said to be some kind of fascist.

Now, he needs to be a linguist because, owing to Sunderland's lousy results so far, he's complaining that his team are not gelling well as his new players cannot speak English.

Just to set the record straight, di Canio wasn't exactly thinking perfect Queen's English when he signed an entire new tribe which comprised Italian, French, Swedish, Czech, Greek and Korean players.

That's not really a football team.

That's the sort of United Nations coalition you put together when you are going to invade a place like Syria.

Di Canio's urgent task now - besides finding a Star Trek universal translator which allows even Klingons to speak to Romulans - is to get his English-speaking players to pitch in with language lessons and, as he said, "to explain, to help us to do this on the field, in training sessions, in the shower, in the bed, wherever they want".

Excuse me, in the bed too? I applaud Pally Paolo's efforts to improve communication among mankind but I think he may be carrying team spirit a little too far.

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