I READ with concern the report on job applicants who do not show up at scheduled interviews (my paper, March 31).

This may be a symptom of a larger social problem today: The dire lack of empathy for and ability to understand and share other people's feelings. The focus is on the self, that "what I do not feel does no harm".

Another reason is the misplaced sense of entitlement, or the "me syndrome". The result? Ungracious behaviour.

In the case of no-shows at job interviews, the candidates fail to understand the effort needed to arrange the interviews.

I am sure there are many reasons - some of which could be valid - for the no-shows, but they should not be an excuse.

This blatant disregard for others is rude and irresponsible.

All it takes is a phone call (or an e-mail) to inform the interviewer about not being able to make it, and the candidates should be honest with their reasons.

There are many other examples of ungracious behaviour, such as cutting into others people's path without saying sorry, speaking loudly on the mobile phone and walking into a lift without thanking the person who holds it for you.

It seems that people these days find it hard to say "sorry", "thank you" and "excuse me".

What is worrying is that this disregard for other people's feelings and efforts - in arranging job interviews, for example - may become a social norm.

Let's start with our own family and closest friends. Do we say "thank you" when things are done for us? Do the children thank their parents for keeping the home clean and putting food on the table? Do we apologise when we make mistakes?

Some may feel that it is odd to show those close to us such niceties, but I think that should be where we start if we are going to be a civil and gracious society. If we cannot be nice to those who are close to us, how can we do the same for total strangers?

People do appreciate good manners and I believe they will reciprocate with niceties too.

Even if they don't, we should not treat them badly.

Research has shown that people who are positive enjoy better health and are generally happier too. It really takes very little effort to be pleasant and our hectic lifestyle is no excuse to be otherwise.

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