AN MSN conversation was recent cause for angst for a friend of mine.

MSN, as most computer users will know, is an online chat software from Microsoft used to keep in touch with friends and contacts, often acting as a replacement for the telephone.

My friend, C, had been using it and SMS to keep in touch with the guy she'd been dating for a month.

It was not her ideal situation - she's what she calls a "high contact" sort of person, who needs to see someone regularly, as well as talk on the phone with them.

But the guy - who, to be fair, is extremely busy, thanks to his work demands - considers MSN and SMS conversations to be adequate, and saw my friend once a week or so.

Now, the two had great chemistry and got along like houses on blazing, blazing fire when together.

But given the situation, the relationship was bound to self-destruct.

This it did, predictably, over MSN.

"I really like you as a person. I think in time we could be good friends," C typed on MSN, explaining that she didn't think he really had time for a relationship. Hurt, overwhelmed and angry, he logged off on her.

"Oh my god," she proceeded to SMS me (the irony was not lost on either one of us). "It's the first time I've ever been logged off on."

Now, while I get her frustration with the guy, I don't think he did anything wrong. Being of the computer generation, he probably thinks that an MSN conversation is equal to at least a telephone conversation.

I don't hold that view myself - I think e-mail and SMSes are pretty impersonal. If my partner were to use those as the sole means of communication, I'd be unhappy too.

But, in a world where mobile phones and the Web are being widely used for work and play, I do wonder about the future impact online and mobile chat tools will have on relationships.

A study, published last year on British website cellular- news.com, found that 40 per cent of British women and 62 per cent of those under the age of 24 find it easiest to communicate feelings via text rather than face to face.

Also, I wonder how well you can get to know a person with limited or no physical contact, and whether it all amounts to real communication.

Another friend, S, once used to spend hours on the Internet "getting to know" people we'd met while clubbing together.

"You don't get to know a person over MSN," I opined. "You miss out on all the little things, like facial and vocal expressions. Those make up a person too."

S eventually discovered that meeting someone in person was a different beast from discovering what he or she was like online.

Still, S has maintained some of those friendships. And what she learnt online about these people acted as a precursor to getting to know them up-close and personal.

I wonder what the future of online and mobile communication will look like, and what I'll tell my children about online relationships.

What I do know is this: People thrive on physical contact.

It's a huge part of what makes up our experience of love, of feeling connected - be it with a friend or a partner.

So, I suppose I will tell my children that although chatting online and SMS-texting may be easier, you're going to have to bite the bullet some day and log off

For more my paper stories click here.