EVEN though violin virtuoso Vanessa Mae became estranged from her mother in 1999 after firing her as her manager, she had always held a glimmer of hope that they would one day reconcile.

Now, one tersely worded e-mail has dashed all possibility of a happy reunion.

Her mother, Mrs Pamela Nicholson, had been approached by the BBC to be part of a documentary on the Singapore-born pop-classical star.

Her e-mail reply?

'My daughter is nearly 30. That part of my life is well and truly over.'

Vanessa told the Telegraph that it was something she had come to expect from the woman who helped to shape her career.

'Judging from the e-mail, it's pretty clear that she is not interested in me as a daughter,' said Vanessa.

'But it wasn't that surprising to me. I think it was more surprising to the BBC, reading the e-mail with me. But I grew up with her, so I know what she's like.'

The revelations were made during the making of a BBC1 documentary series called The Making of Me. One episode focuses on how Vanessa, 29, developed her prowess on the violin.

The episode was aired in the UK last Wednesday.

Following the documentary, Vanessa gave detailed interviews to the British press about how hard her mother, a talented pianist herself, pushed her to be a star.

Vanessa, who is the youngest soloist ever to record the demanding Beethoven and Tchaikovsky violin concertos when she was 13, said her mother never believed that her daughter should have a life outside her music career.

'She thought a lot of things in music were a race,' said Vanessa, who described her mother as intensely competitive.

'Got to be the youngest to record this, to record that. I never thought that was important. We're (musicians) not athletes.'

Vanessa claims that her mother once even told her that her love for her was 'conditional' on her performance as a musician.

She told the Daily Mail that her mother used to say to her 'I love you because you are my daughter, but you'll never be special to me unless you play the violin.'

Born in Singapore, Vanessa moved to London when she was three. That was when she said her mother began training her to be a musician.

When she turned eight, her mother would take her out of school for half of each day to concentrate on her violin.

AHEAD OF THE CURVE

By the age of 11, she was accepted to the prestigious Royal College Of Music, where she was seven years younger than most of her peers.

Mrs Nicholson then took it upon herself to manage every aspect of her daughter's life, Vanessa said.

She controlled everything from Vanessa's bank accounts, to choosing her wardrobe and make-up, to how she spent her free time.

Vanessa wasn't even allowed to slice bread because Mrs Nicholson was afraid that she might hurt her hands.

She was also forced to drop all her friends from school because her mother believed that they were distracting her from her music.

Even being ill wasn't good enough to excuse her from giving her best.

'Once, as a teenager, I remember being sick before a show... and the look my mother gave me because I couldn't give 100 per cent was chilling,' she said.

'She'd tell me I'd only get a good husband if I was successful, and she condoned the fact that my music tutors would slap me across the face if I wasn't putting everything I had into my playing.'

By the time Vanessa hit 21, she had had enough and sacked her mother.

For a while, mother and daughter remained on good terms.

When Vanessa visited Singapore shortly after the sacking to perform at a private function, she came with her mother.

'We still work really, really well in the career sense. We still share the same ideals and dreams,' she told reporters during that trip.

'We're very tight.'

But, according to the British press, the pair parted ways soon after and have not been on speaking terms since.

Still, the sexy star, who has sold 10 million copies of her albums world-wide, acknowledges that her mother played a big role in helping her get to where she is today.

'It was a hothouse environment and there was a lot of pressure on me, but I think perversely I benefited from it,' she told the Telegraph.

'Kids can be born with potential but unless it's encouraged - pushed, even - I don't think it will ever come to fruition.

'I would not be here today without my mother and she has helped me have a career that I love and to follow a vocation. I am sad that it has been at the expense of my relationship with her.'

She also thanked her mother for her music genes.

Her biological father (a Thai man from whom Mrs Nicholson separated when Vanessa was four) wasn't musical, whereas, she says, her mother was the best sight-reader she has ever encountered.

'So (my talent) definitely came from her, if any of it was genetic.'

Vanessa said she had tried to use the making of the BBC1 documentary to reconnect with her mother by inviting her to contribute to it.

She had hoped to explore the root of her talent, and find out whether she was born with her musical ability, or whether it was cultivated by her mother's determination for her to succeed.

But that e-mail has caused her to give up hope of ever reuniting with Mrs Nicholson.

Asked if she missed her mother, Vanessa said: 'She has not been around for me to talk to for so many years now.

'But I carry the e-mail she sent to the BBC around with me, and if I ever have any pangs about what our relationship might have been like, I read that and realise it is never going to be.'

additional reporting by Yvonne Phoo

5 Things about Vanessa Mae

• First instrument piano, at age 3. Switched to violin at age 5.

• Practised at least four hours a day. Birthday was only day off.

• Ranked wealthiest entertainer under 30 in UK, at ???32 million ($86m) in 2006.

• First date at age 20. 'My mum sent a bodyguard with me, and we had to meet with her afterwards,' she said.

• Lives in London mansion with wine dealer boyfriend, Lionel Catelan, 38.