Couch Grouch: Human monsters are scarier

Couch Grouch: Human monsters are scarier

Monsters rule this week, and the human ones in House Of Cards are far scarier than the inhuman creatures in The Originals.

Oh, you already know how vampires, witches and werewolves behave in The Originals, a spin-off from The Vampire Diaries TV series.

But in the riveting House Of Cards, Kevin Spacey is such a vindictive political animal and master manipulator that he makes those supernatural bloodsuckers look like puny, posy amateurs.

The series, adapted from an original 1990 British mini-series centring on a chief whip scheming to become the leader of the Conservative Party, is a Netflix production in America with its first season of 13 episodes streamed online all at one go last year. Season 2 was released earlier this year and a third chapter is on the way.

I binge-watched the show and, by the fourth episode, I wanted to kill Spacey's character.

He plays Frank Underwood, a South Carolina congressman and the house majority whip, who, in the opening episode, was expected to be named Secretary Of State by the new president-elect whom he had helped engineer to victory in the White House.

The problem is that the incoming president's team thinks differently and passes him over for the post, an act which sets the tone of vengeance and unbridled retribution underpinning the series.

Hell hath not seen a power player so badly scorned and the supremely miffed Underwood launches a power grab.

This American version leans heavier on the stench of power rather than the attainment of it.

It looks first-rate, even better than the original to me, because of the pinpoint acting, brainy plotting and terribly wicked truths.

"Such a waste of talent. He chose money over power," goes one line.

Would you enjoy it if you did not give a hoot about American politics? Probably not.

But in the machinations conducted by maestro- monster Spacey, you can still admire this entwining puppeteer's drama even if you do not love it.

One episode, in which he juggles lying to a grieving family that had just lost a daughter in a small town with conning an entire group of teacher's union leaders in Washington DC, is so good it qualifies as a lesson in multi-tasking.

The show gives him a queen who is equally ruthless, ambitious and cunning. Robin Wright plays Claire Underwood, who runs a non-government organisation (NGO) and is the sort who fires half of her long-serving staff mercilessly, then claims she had thought very hard about it.

But in her unmoving coldness and zero patience for anything weak or sentimental, she exudes the aura of an ice queen from Arctic hell.

Man, when you cross this lethal, soulless couple, you will truly get slaughtered.

In fact, you will get it even if you do not cross them.

"I almost pity him. He didn't choose to be put on my platter," Underwood tells the audience about the latest sucker he has just carved up to feed to the dogs.

The actor actually looks right into the camera, breaks the fourth wall in theatrical terms, and tells the viewer in smug asides how dumb his unsuspecting enemies are.

That is a risky move for any TV show, but Spacey is so good he just does it as a natural extension of his sly, mean self and, by default, this big amoral play.

He nails down the deviousness with dead-eyed weariness, as though this game is so easy he lies, cajoles, strong-arms, threatens and exerts grotesque power just for the heck of seeing things fall exactly where he wants them.

In other words, just for the fun of it.

And this is my principal gripe about the series: Like Superman without Lex Luthor, Underwood has no natural enemy, not even the stand-offish president and his gullible aides, the enraged union leaders he plays out or the top ranks of Congress he strings along.

Having been schooled previously in political skullduggery in TV series such as The West Wing, Boss, Scandal and even the sitcom, Veep, I wonder about this set-up.

Is it even possible for a mere congressman to do all this and can the rest of Washington be this stupid?

This is especially when the man leaks crucial career-ending information to an ambitious young cub reporter, Zoe Barnes (Kate Mara looking criminally under-aged), like Deep Throat in Nixon's Watergate scandal, and then beds her in a most icky old dude-tiny kid liaison.

Somebody is saying that the Net-savvy scribe is far ahead of the traditional print media here, but there is nothing to convince me that this least believable aspect of the show is not just a convenient plot device to cast a young actress for titillation.

But American politics is all about the human condition writ large, corrupt and hideous.

House Of Cards is not after your heart.

Meanwhile, over at The Originals, the world's first vampires, three siblings aged about 300 years old, return to their ancestral birthplace in New Orleans, Louisiana, aka home of vamps, witches, werewolves, hybrids, great jazz music and dramatic balconies where vampire bosses preside over their many minions.

I have almost seen this show before.

I think it is what would have happened if Twilight had stayed on and become a TV series.

Followers of The Vampire Diaries will recognise the three principal fang folks here because they popped up in that series - especially chief psycho, Klaus Mikaelson (Joseph Morgan), who was a main baddie in a couple of seasons there - and now, in this spin-off, they come back to reclaim their home turf.

The unhinged Klaus - along with fellow immortals Elijah (Daniel Gillies), who is the good brother, and sister Rebekah (Claire Holt), who is sometimes good, sometimes bad - wage war against an army of vicious vamps with hot voodoo witches and a pregnant werewolf-chick thrown into the squabbling mix.

The unborn wolfie baby is Klaus' child and, as always, there is something cataclysmic about it which requires the vampy trio to defend it against pesky intruders.

Now, when I say hot witches, I really mean hot because these bite-and-spite shows are really all about super babes, rock stars and the hip kids from Abercrombie And Fitch having a wild raving party, right?

The great-looking cast fight, growl, hiss, kiss, die, get their necks slashed, get revived again until I stop caring and just go with the blood flow.

I have got to hand it to The Originals though. It skews to a more mature, less fawning crowd - at least nobody looks high school-ish lame - and to its eternal credit, there is actually less sexy fluff and more family stuff here.

I forget what main reason this fracas is about due to the ever-changing alliances and confusing dalliances, but I do spot the ongoing love-hate brotherly bond between evil maniac Klaus and noble insomniac Elijah, since nobody looks like they ever sleep here unless they are stabbed and sealed in a coffin.

Klaus does this to his loving bro right at the beginning. Then he desperately tries to undo his dastardly act of betrayal by spending the next few episodes attempting to rescue him.

Oh, well.

Like I said, I stopped caring.

I just watch with a numbness which comes from the blood being drained from my head.

stlife@sph.com.sg

View it

HOUSE OF CARDS

RTL-CBS Entertainment (StarHub Channel 509 / SingTel mio

TV Channel 318) Wednesday, 9.55pm

THE ORIGINALS

WarnerTV (StarHub Channel 515)

Friday, 9pm


This article was first published on June 5, 2014.
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