Hi, dear audience.
The Mortal Instruments here. Just wondering if you've decided on whether you want me to be the new Twilight.
You've already seen The Hunger Games?
But I thought I did everything right. Young, pretty cast, supernatural elements. What more do you need?
I've even got a soundtrack of hip new sounds, and it's far edgier than The Hunger Games' dreary noise.
At least you can dance to some of my choices - Bassnectar, Zedd, Seven Lions and Myon.
Really, this collection should come with a free glowstick.
I've included some dreary nonsense too: Ariana Grande, Demi Lovato, Colbie Caillat... They all try and create copies of Christina Perri's Cullen-linked hit A Thousand Years.
Still not interested, huh?
I know Twilight had some credibility when it came to music. Thom Yorke, The Noisettes, Iron and Wine.
I put together AFI, Jessie J and Owl City. What do mean they are more like crud-ability?
Okay, if you still insist on saying no, there are sequels on the way. Maybe I can win you over then.