A wound that has yet to heal. That was how Wong Li Lin described her relationship with her newly-estranged husband, fellow actor and TV host Allan Wu.
Speaking to RazorTV, the 41-year-old actress opened up about life after divorce.
We bring you the full Q&A here:
Q: There have been many speculations of the cause of the break-up and you've chosen not to answer them. Are you ready to address them now?
I don't really need to address them to anybody. This is between Allan and me. Suffice to say.
And so we just have to be mature about it and find a way that best suits him, so that he can grow and have the life that he deserves, as I do, as our children do, more than anything.
As for the why? Does it matter to you? I've already figured it out. You're really just curious, so is the rest of the world...
He's right and he's wrong...it's really none of that. We both have our rights and wrongs. We both tried.
I would have, as he would, loved to be together, and for the kids. You know that idea of what's perfect remains. But such is life.
Q: The couple have 2 kids, 8-year-old Sage and 5-year-old Jonas. How did they cope with the news of your split ?
I think as with all children, they grow up with the world as their mom and dad. And if that changes, it is unsettling, I'm sure.
As with anything in life, nothing remains a constant. And this much I've learnt: I conduct my life with honesty and kindness as much as I can; and in the same way, I would deliver the news to my children in the same vein and what they can absorb.
To them now, it's just that mum and dad are not together but they receive the same amount of love and attention. Allan is a very loving dad and he loves his children verymuch and would endeavour to spend as much time with them as possible. And him and I, while estranged will always be connected because of the children.
So for that, I think they are now used to the fact that we don't live together. I think it is just one of those things, life continues and comes in different ways and they will have to just handle it.
A long time before the actual divorce, there was big guilt. Having to say, 'Oh no, what do I do? Am I just really messing up my children?' And then later when you come to some clarity that if you do live honestly and kindly, everything just works out. If you ever just conduct things truthfully, it works.
And I've encouraged them not to be afraid of asking questions to dad or me. If they were sad to share that and if they were unhappy or happy to share that, and it's okay. And sometimes you can see they wrestle with guilt or whatever, I remind them it's not their issue. Their job is just to be kids and to be loved by us, and I think that's really helped.
Q: Wong spent the better part of her 9-year marriage as a full-time mum. How are you personally coping with it?
If you asked me 2-3 months ago, I'm like swamped. I was really juggling too much. There was a lot on my plate. Everybody wanted to know. It was important for us to have some time-out to slow it down a little bit until we had time to breathe. A moment to ourselves to collect ourselves.
So now things are a little bit better. Still has some ways to go.
So how am I? I'm doing great! I'm exactly where I want to be and I feel good about that.
Q: How wld you describe your relationship with Allan right now?
It has to heal. That's all I can say. Like with anything, it's like having a cut. It's probably a bit raw in various ways, but it has to heal. That can only take time.
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