She knows people will judge her. They may think she is useless, hopeless, even uncaring.
But she says she was helpless too. Helpless to stop her boyfriend from stamping on her daughter, four, and breaking the girl's thigh bone.
Helpless as he twisted the girl's ankle so much that it caused another fracture. Speaking to The New Paper in her one room rental flat, the petite woman said she was furious when her boyfriend, Mohammad Rudy Madon, 37, flew into a drug-induced violent rage and hit Fiona (not her real name) repeatedly.
There were six violent episodes in 2012. Cradling one of her sons, a one-yearold boy, she said: "I tried to stop Rudy, but he's bigger and stronger." But the one question she could not or would not answer was why she had not sought medical treatment for Fiona for more than a month despite the poor girl hobbling around in agony. The New Paper asked her this three times. Each time, she remained silent. If it was because she was terrified of her abusive boyfriend, she would not say.
But Fiona's childcare centre principal, who finally intervened and took her to hospital, said that the mother seemed to be terrified of Mohammad Rudy.
The former army regular is now behind bars, and Fiona is getting better. But the mother is struggling to cope with raising four of her six children, including one-year-old twins, on her own. Neither she nor Fiona can be named. Anyone who has suffered a broken bone knows how painful it can be. For more than a month after she was abused, Fiona hobbled around bravely at home. She did not go to school for three weeks.
When she eventually went back to the childcare centre, workers there noticed her injuries. They called the mother, offering to take the girl to hospital. She agreed.
Its principal said the mother had told her that she was afraid of Mohammad Rudy because he used to beat her and her child. When he found out what the principal had done, he was fearful his crime would be discovered. Fiona was taken to hospital and a police report was made. Her abuser was arrested.