All his dirty little secrets
PUBLISHED ONApril 28, 2015 3:44 AM
Six men reveal their sexual experiences with women they just met.
I spent $50,000 on a singer
At one time, I regularly went to "flower" discos (which were originally Thai-style discos) for drinks with colleagues.
Aside from paying for our drinks, we'd buy garlands for the entertainers to show our support for them. They, in turn, would show their appreciation by drinking with us.
There was one pretty entertainer from China whom I was really fond of. In the six months she was in Singapore, I must have shelled out about $50,000 on her.
I led a double life. I would tell my wife that I was meeting my buddies when I was actually seeing her. She was like a girlfriend who was very adventurous in bed, but it all ended after she went back to China and I never heard from her again.
- John, a marketing executive in his 30s. Married for 14 years with a daughter, 11, and a son, eight. His " foreign affair" took place a few years ago when he was earning just $60,000 a year.
I pick up young women at KTV bars
Entertaining clients in my line of business is a very common thing. What my wife doesn't know, or at least pretends not to know, is that while entertaining clients, I entertain myself too.
I often take clients out to KTV bars, where the singing is always secondary. There are young women who are willing to have more than just a chat.
Once, I made out with one of the women in the back seat of my car. I felt young again. I hadn't felt that way in years.
- C.H. Yong, a construction business boss in his 40s.
Wife saw my date's text
My work requires me to travel, and I make use of these opportunities to have escapades with various women.
Once, I went on a weekend getaway with a young woman, telling my wife I had to travel once again for work. I left my mobile phone at home, realising it only as I was driving to pick up my weekend date.
When I returned from the getaway, my wife asked me how my trip was. I was surprised she bothered to ask, but it turned out that my date had sent me a text telling me she was waiting for me, and my wife had seen it.
I lied that the woman had been with my colleagues and me, but my wife laughed scornfully: She knew there had been no official event because she had called the office to check.
She had also seen all the messages from colleagues warning me that the girl had been trying to reach me.
I now have a travel partner on all my business trips: My wife.
- Casey, an event manager in his late 50s. His wife suspected all along that he had been having various flings, but they've decided to remain married for the sake of their teenage son.
I chatted up a woman at a bar
I sometimes work late into the night and often meet clients at unusual hours. However, not all the people I meet are clients. I met a 30-something woman at a bar one night and we started chatting.
She gave me signals that she was interested in me, from the way she looked at me and brushed her body against mine. She knew I was married; she was, too.
She made the first move by inviting me to her apartment. I was hesitant at first, but it was too tempting an offer.
I told my wife I would be coming home late, and not to wait up for me. That night led to a weekly affair that went on for a year.
I called it off after my wife became suspicious about my frequent late nights.
- Michael, a lawyer in his 40s. He has been married for seven years and has a three-year-old daughter.
We travel as a group and have affairs
My friends and I take regular trips to Thailand, Indonesia and the Philippines.
Three guys in our group of five are married, and the remaining two are in supposedly serious relationships.
But whenever we travel, we take a holiday from our morals, and we all frequently hook up with someone - more often than not, it will be for paid sex.
Our wives and partners always think we are playing golf or away on business. I suppose doing it as a group gives us more courage to be unfaithful - with less guilt.
- Samuel, a business owner in his 40s. He has been married for 15 years and has two children, 12 and six.
I have fun at sleazy pubs
My friends and I quite often go to sleazy pubs where the foreign waitresses double as hookers. I've never actually taken one home because my wife's always there.
I never have enough money to get a hotel room either - and my wife would kill me if she found out.
But in those pubs, I'll just cop a feel whenever I can, and pay a little tip. I know, it's sad. But I enjoy the excitement it gives me.
- Alan, 48, an executive in a furniture company. He has been married for 20 years and has no children.
I only have one-night hook-ups
I work in the nightlife business and there are plenty of chances for me to hook up with women, especially when they are slightly drunk.
I make it a point to have one-night hook-ups only, no matter how tempted I am to go back for more with the same person. Especially now that I am married, I must make sure that these "clients" of mine don't call me persistently, so I don't allow a relationship to develop.
How far these hook-ups go depends on the time of night. It's also sometimes limited by the size of the car the woman is driving.
With a bigger car, we can "do more" with each other.
- James, a club manager in his 30s. He married for a second time last year, and has no children.
Steamy affair with my fellow lawyer
I fell in love with a woman I met at a club two years ago. We had what I thought would be a one-night-stand, but the affair lasted eight months.
As we were both lawyers who worked very late into the night, we would meet for sex twice a week. I ended the affair the moment my wife became possessive and stopped me from going clubbing.
- John, a lawyer in his 40s. He has two teenage children.
I met a woman online
It started when I joined an online dating site. I thought it was harmless, just chatting with girls online.
I pretended to be someone I wasn't: My profile stats were all made up - I guess it was a way to make myself feel less guilty.
So I treated it like a game, until it became real: One day, a woman invited me to meet her for coffee near her office. We met later in the evening at a hotel, and she even offered to split the bill, though I didn't let her. We never met again after that.
I tried getting in touch with her but she had no interest in a long-term relationship. At least not with me.
- William, a car dealer in his mid-30s. He's been married for six years and has one child.
Had a fling with an office intern
It started off innocently enough, with me showing her the ropes. Soon, we were going out for meals together, even on days when I was supposed to be off work.
I'd come into the office pretending to be clearing some work when in fact, my only purpose was to see her.
I'm sure my colleagues knew exactly what I was up to, but no one bothered enough to say anything to my face.
We were never physically intimate apart from a few kisses, and the relationship ended last year when she started seeing a guy almost half my age.
- Jacob, a publishing executive in his 40s. He has been married for eight years and has a four-year-old daughter.
* All names have been changed
This article first appeared in the April 2015 issue of Her World. Her World, Singapore's #1 women's magazine, is now available in both print and digital formats. Log on to www.herworldplus.com to subscribe!