The best beauty tips ever

The best beauty tips ever
Scarlett Johansson makes a personal and public statement with her latest haircut.
PHOTO: Reuters

Someone please give me back my first quarter of 2017! It's already the Fool's month, and it's getting annoying how things are panning out, rather than amusing.

The ban on laptops and cameras in carry-on luggage while flying to the United States and Britain on specific airlines via certain airports, has gotten everyone in a tizzy, especially parents who have forgotten how to entertain their kids.

But have people forgotten that everyone - business people, IT execs, journalists, single women, holiday-makers, couples on their honeymoon - in short, ALL travellers are affected?

To me, it raises serious concerns about pilfering, damaged luggage and lost information. Who will take responsibility for this? There's no telling that other countries won't follow suit on the ban either.

I just wish there was a better way around this, rather than some knee-jerk reaction.

Given the recent attack at Westminster in London, terrorism plots on our doorstep, pastors and activists spirited away, mounting political tension and rising inflation, among other pressing issues, you would think we've got a lot on our hands already.

Yet there are politicians offering a RM50,000 (S$15,000) prize for a "bigotry" essay to discredit another. I wonder sometimes, if this is what you call #alternativereality - in social media-speak: "shakes head", "rolls eyes".

Kristen Stewart showing off her empowering new look at the premiere of her new film Personal Shopper in New york.
Photo: Reuters

While on the subject of writing, a press release I received recently attributed this quote to a manager: "I am totes excited about the whole event." I'm guessing the manager did not really say that.

My first instinct was to correct what I thought was a typo. Then it occurred to me - wait, that's a millennial talking! I know this as a few live under my roof. What was hilarious was that no one else in the office knew what it meant.

Even funnier was when my all-too-wise No.3 son said that millennials don't use the word anymore.

That it was probably some older person trying to sound cool and young. (If anyone wants to do a market survey, you know where to go.)

If you haven't figured it out already, "totes" is short for totally.

In the last couple of years, we've been told that the language used in newspapers is too archaic, that we should write for a younger audience. Sorry, but I draw the line at "totes" and other "amazeballs" expressions.

Singer Halsey poses at the premiere of the film "Fifty Shades Darker" in Los AngelesPhoto: Reuters

Something else annoying which has been cropping up lately is how some people like to leave you hanging. When someone is pitching a contract/proposal, asking you out for dinner, or basically, asking you a question, how is it ever acceptable to leave things in the air?

These are not trick questions, mind you - a straightforward yes or no in most instances will do. Yet there seems to be some misguided notion that it's kinder or more considerate to stay quiet than give a straightforward rejection.

This, I reckon, is a by-product of this age of Facebook, WhatsApp and what-have-you chat sites/apps, where it's not objectionable to leave conversations open-ended. Well, guess what? In the real world, it doesn't work that way!

Annoyances aside, someone unearthed this post that was circulating on the Internet and shared: "Things you shouldn't wear after 50" ( - the original author is Michelle Poston Combs).

Read also: Secrets to make unwashed hair look amazing

My initial reaction was, not another one of those, I groaned. Then I read this: "You are over 50 for f*** sake. Wear whatever you want."

Whoa! I'm liking this article already!

If you're thinking you're nowhere near 50 so this doesn't apply to you, stop in your tracks. These brilliant style and beauty tips make perfect sense no matter what age you are, so pay attention.

Basically, she advises, don't wear: The weight of the world - "When you wear the weight of the world on your shoulders, you age". Other stuff to shed are: Shame and regret; Rose-coloured glasses (time for a reality check); Stiff upper lip (loosen up, gal); Too many hats and, my favourite, Bitch Resting Face - "Just kidding. Wear that all you want!"

And, on a parting note, here's one beauty trend to heed: the anti-Trump haircut. Apparently, it's well-documented history that many women cut their hair short during political uncertainty.

Read also: L'Oreal's smart brush 'listens' to hair, recommends luxury treatments

"Women are rebelling against traditional ideas of femininity and making personal and public statements with their hair looks. Stripping away the prettiness and embracing a tougher, bolder aesthetic.

It's an empowering look and publicly demonstrates that she's in charge," Luke Hersheson, John Frieda UK Creative Director said of the new look in The Telegraph story.

So, while the "Brexit cut" leads the way with its new blunter, choppier texture in Britain, this appears to be the American response.

Thanks, good to know, still keeping my long hair for now.

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