As with many other things in life, all that glitters is not gold - money is a wonderful tool but it has the power to destroy relationships too. We at GET.com have rounded up five ways money can ruin relationships so that you can prevent your own relationship from going up in flames.
1. Money comes before your partner
Everybody knows money is important; without money, surviving in Singapore is practically rendered impossible. However, if money comes before your partner does, then your relationship is likely to take a hit. No amount of money is going to replace the love, wants and needs your partner craves from you!
Of course, there are cases where both parties in the relationship are workaholics with the aim of making as much money as possible. But even so, without some tender loving care, I don't suppose the relationship will be one that is very fulfilling or healthy.
2. Not being truthful about your financialstanding
Trust is important in all aspects of a relationship. Without being completely truthful about your financial standing, how do you expect your significant other to just ride the wave and not discuss anything related to finances if the both of you are looking to get married and/or participate in BTO sale launches in the near future?
Are you spending more than what you want your partner to be aware of? Do you have credit card debt that you don't want your partner to know about? Do you not want to tell your partner how much money you actually earn?
Although being transparent about your finances isn't the easiest thing to do, it is something that ought to be done to avoid any potential devastation to the relationship in the name of issues related to fear, shame or even resentment.
3. You don't make money decisions together
Nobody says you have to seek each other's advice or opinion when it comes to getting a McSpicy meal or a cup of earl grey milk tea, okay? Trivial money decisions can go without being made together, but the same cannot be said for big (usually important) money decisions.
What do I mean exactly? Well, things like working towards your financial goals together, knowing what's going on with your combined savings or investments, deciding when is the "right" time to buy a house or have a baby so on and so forth matter.
It sure doesn't help when one person in the relationship is the control freak when it comes to money.
So, if you aren't already discussing and making big money decisions as a team together, please get moving and start communicating. You do not want to keep mum and be ignorant of what's happening to your portion of your hard-earned money in the savings account, right?
Here are 4 ways to manage your money as a couple in Singapore.
4. Lies start snowballing into bigger lies
Extending from point #2, this point reinforces the importance of having mutual trust in each other. Lies, regardless how big (e.g. how much debt you have) or small (e.g. how much those killer heels cost), will lead to more lies and hence, frequent fights.
Distance between both parties in the relationship sets in and over time, when nothing is done to alleviate the worsening issue, love is lost. By the time you get to this point, your relationship's already six feet under - dusty, dead and inevitably gone.
5. Income difference sparking quarrels
There are two sides to this.
On one side, you could be the one earning less than your partner and getting criticised by your partner from time to time for your choice of work or career path.
You may be chasing your dreams and doing what you love though it does not pay the best or most, but that's what keeps you happy and fulfilled. If your partner claims that he or she supports you in what you do for a living, but wind up at the end of the month whining about how you make less money, that can ruin the energy of the relationship.
On the other side, you may be the one earning much more than your partner and feeling short-changed by your partner not contributing enough to household or joint expenses. Before it all ends in a big explosive quarrel about income difference, try to have small talks about spending and budgeting so that you can both speak your thoughts.
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