Beyond the Kate Spade bag

SINGAPORE - Does it come with the box?

That's what I want to know.

I want very much to bid for the Kate Spade bag that MP for Marine Parade GRC Tin Pei Ling is donating to an Association of Women for Action and Research (Aware) fundraiser for auction on Sept10.

But I'm really interested only in the box that Ms Tin posed with in the photo that Aware described as "one of the defining images of the 2011 General Election".

(By the way, it was a watershed election.)

No one really knows what - if anything - was in the Kate Spade box. It could be a Kate Spade bag. It could be a dead raccoon.

It doesn't matter. It's the box that is famous.

I don't mind paying the $500 reserve price for just the empty box - though another dead raccoon would also come in handy.

But why stop at Ms Tin's Kate Spade bag (or box)?

Being a citizen of the current and future richest country in the world (according to the 2012 Wealth Report compiled by Citibank and Knight Frank), I have so much disposable cash that I'm also looking to acquire other local cultural flotsam and jetsam drifting out there in the vast ocean of Internet memes.

Here is my wishlist:

A piece of 'My Grandfather Road'

Artist Samantha Lo was arrested for acts of vandalism that included painting the words "My grandfather road" on a public road. I want a piece of that road.

I'll pay for the jackhammer.

Ris Low's Miss S'pore 2009 tiara and sash

Has it been three years already? I miss her.

Alex Ong's scarf

Mr Ong is famous for the viral video of him pushing an elderly woman off a stationary bus. He is also famous for wearing a scarf in the video. Photographs of him also show him rocking a scarf. I want that scarf.

Army backpack

If I can't get the backpack the maid is carrying for the soldier, I'll just take the maid. My mansion needs some tidying up. You can keep the soldier.

Ah Lian's earphones

Her real name is Huina. She was called "the most polite ah lian" because of the viral video of her enduring the verbal abuse of another passenger on the MRT before retaliating. She later told The New Paper that she didn't react at first because she didn't hear the other passenger as she had her earphones on. I want those earphones.

Tin Pei Ling's hat

I'm talking about the hat she wore in the foot-stamping video.

I'm surprised this eye-catching item isn't in more demand than the unseen Kate Spade bag. It will go perfectly with my Alex Ong scarf and my Miss Singapore tiara and sash on my sedan chair. Dead raccoon is optional.

NDP 2011 Funpack

They wrote a song about it, stealing the tune from Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. I understand Madonna also claims Lady Gaga stole from her. I believe everyone stole from Weird Al Yankovic.

4-storey Abercrombie & Fitch ad

I'm talking about the hoarding showing a giant shirtless headless man outside Knightsbridge on Orchard Road last year. I want to get it as a present for my wife. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

MRT fire extinguisher

I'm talking about the one that a passenger used to break a train window during The Great MRT Breakdown of 2011. Apparently, it can also be used to put out fires.

Saw Phaik Hwa's sedan chair

I want to be carried in it everywhere I go by the shirtless A&F guys.

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