He stopped answering my calls after confessing his feelings to me

He stopped answering my calls after confessing his feelings to me

Q: I've known this guy R for more than a year. We have been pretty close and had numerous conversations. I used to have a crush on him but never pursued it. As we became closer, I realised that his actions and words somehow indicated that he had feelings for me too.

Just recently, about a week back, he confessed to me. I was really happy about it. I was supposed to call him that night and have a proper talk about our feelings for each other. But when I called, he didn't respond so well.

In fact, he said he will message me later, and that he was busy at the moment. I didn't receive any message after that. The next day I called and messaged him, but there was no response. Then I called back one last time and he picked up the call. He said he was sorry for not attending to my phone calls as he was in a rush for work. He gave a couple of reasons for not getting back to me as he promised, but I didn't feel assured.

He responded to my WhatsApp messages, and they seemed genuine, but I have my doubts. I didn't contact him after that. Yesterday, I called him back twice but there was no answer or messages. I'm not sure if he's avoiding me and I'm very confused. He never used to behave like this.

Even if he doesn't answer my calls, he would get back to me later. I'm not sure how to react to this and I wish he would give me an explanation if there's a problem. I really like this guy, and I do know he likes me back, but right now I'm not sure what's going on in his mind.


A: It is in moments like these that one usually loathes the fact that one is not psychic. How easy it would be to know exactly what the guy you like is thinking. That would be one way to solve one of the more enduring mysteries of the world.

But, alas, we are not psychics and there is absolutely no way of knowing what the other person is thinking. A good indication, though, is their behaviour and that can tell you a lot. It does seem like he is avoiding your phone calls. Yet, he had replied to your WhatsApp messages so he is not avoiding you totally.

Interestingly, you doubted the sincerity of his messages. Ask yourself why. Is it because you were trying to figure out what it meant in light of his other behaviour? Or, did you doubt what he was saying? It is likely that he got cold feet.

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