PUBLISHED ONFebruary 17, 2025 4:58 AMByYeo Shu HuiBefore loving another, it is important to love yourself first — this is a lesson learned by local actresses Michelle Chia and Phyllis Quek.
"I feel that my relationship journey was pretty tough," Phyllis told Michelle candidly in the latest episode of travel variety show Camping Around the World. Both made a girls' trip to Thailand's Chiang Rai, where they experienced glamping, riding a hot air balloon, trekking and cooking in the wild.
Phyllis, 52, who has been married to Australia businessman David Cox since 2012, shared that she grew up in a single-parent family and had felt "rather insecure".
"My dream was to have a family and that made me want to date. But I think those intentions were wrong. When you're looking for someone to rely on or someone to dote on you, the people you meet with that mindset are often not ideal," she told Michelle.
Phyllis added that when each of her relationships ended in the past, she would get really upset and cry, afraid of staying at home alone and "drank alcohol just to fall asleep".
Michelle, 49, was surprised when she heard this and remarked that it was a risky way to deal with relationships: "Because when a guy shows interest in you, he'd easily take advantage of your vulnerability."
Phyllis agreed that she could "fall in love again too easily, without realising that it's the wrong type of love".
She added that she has slowly grown stronger and now cherishes herself: "I have to live for myself, not for anyone else."
Michelle shared the same sentiment: "Someone taught me this too, you can't rely on anyone for your happiness."
She also spoke about her own experiences and that her past relationships all lasted between six to eight years.
"I'm very stubborn when it comes to relationships. When I see red flags, I think they are fine. I tell myself that I can try to accept them, maybe it's because I don't want to change others. Instead, I thought I should change myself, but that only made things difficult for me," Michelle said.
She was married to actor Shaun Chen from 2009 to 2011 after dating for six years.
Michelle added that usually in the last three years of her relationships, she would try very hard to make it work and only stop when she came to a point where she couldn't see it working out.
"Once I let go, I don't look back. I won't cry or dwell on it. I think that's my philosophy on life. Every chapter has its end and I just have to turn the page to the next one. Everything is part of the experience. You need to have these moments to create an enriching life," she said.
Camping Around The World is now available on demand for free on Mewatch and airs every Monday at 8pm on Channel 8. Michelle and Phyllis' episode airs tonight (Feb 17).
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