Your survival guide to horror films - what you need to get through one

No one is infallible - not even the most avid horror fan with nerves of steel.

Besides, do we not watch horror films to experience that rush of adrenaline during the familiar jump scares?

And with two Thai horror films - Reside and Pee Nak - on the horizon, we figured this would be as good a time as any to provide you with our survivor's guide for horror films.

Trust us, you'll need this. After all, we know that the Thais have the Midas touch when it comes to cranking out horror - they will dial it up to 11.

1. A FRIEND, A SIBLING, OR YOUR PARTNER - BASICALLY ANOTHER PERSON

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This is pretty self-explanatory. As any sensible character in a horror film knows, you're going to need a companion to use as a human shield.

When that creepy long-haired woman comes climbing out of your television, shove them in front of you and make your escape.

Okay, we're obviously kidding - please don't do that because it's immoral and illegal.

But, it doesn't hurt to have someone tagging along for the viewing because if you're the kind who's scared easily, you're gonna need an emotional-support human.

Having an arm to clutch or a shoulder to bury your face in during the scary bits is a huge game changer in your moviegoing experience.

2. A BLANKET WHEN IT GETS COLD, OR IF YOU NEED TO HIDE

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We all know that one friend who gets cold very easily, even when the air-conditioning is probably set to 25 degrees Celsius.

But beyond keeping you warm and toasty while getting the bejesus scared out of you, a blanket helps if you need that hide-under-the-covers moment when s**t hits the fan, honey.

Be careful not to accidentally spook cinemagoers while you're doing that though, because you could very easily be mistaken as one of The Others.

3. A TALL DRINK OF VANILLA MILKSHAKE AND SOME POPCORN

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Well of course, we're referring to a literal milkshake. What else could we be referring to?

Snacks are a must-have with any cinematic experience because it helps to distract from the rising anxiety and the nagging feeling that a presence is perched on your shoulders.

It also gives your hands something to do besides bruising the arm of your viewing companion.

What snacks are to a movie is what Cher is to Sonny and Cher, Iron Man is to the Avengers, Beyonce is to Destiny's Child, Daenerys is to Game of Thrones... you get the picture.

4. A PAIR OF EARPLUGS WHEN YOU JUST WANT TO TUNE IT ALL OUT

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Then what's the point of watching the movie? Yes, we know.

But for the faint of heart, sometimes you really just need that personal wellness moment for when Jack Nicholson's "Here's Johnny" moment is just too much to handle.

A pair of earplugs is perfect to tune out the mood music and sound effects that intensify the build-up for that jump scare that you know is coming.

Because honey, we're not living for that scare.

5. A FACE ROLLER SO YOU CAN HAVE GOOD SKIN WHILE GETTING FRIGHTENED

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This is perhaps the most bizarre item on the list, but you know what, we're all about reclaiming our time and we're not apologising for it.

Who says you can't squeeze in some self-care time while watching a horror flick?

It helps to release the tension building up in our muscles, smooth out those stubborn fine lines and wrinkles (because we don't want them), and give us gorgeous skin.

You'll enter the cinema looking ratchet and come out serving Beyonce's "I just woke up like this" realness. Fierce!

You don't have to be paiseh about it either because this can be done under the cover of darkness in the cinema.

So, what do you think of our horror film survival guide? It's pretty unique, eh?

We haven't tried it ourselves, but please feel free to do so and let us know if it works.

And if you're looking for some films to watch, we've got the perfect recommendations for you:

RESIDE

WHEN: April 18, Thursday

CAST: Ananda Everingham, Natthaweeranuch Thongmee

WHERE: Cathay Cineplexes, Filmgarde Cineplexes, Eng Wah Cinemas

PEE NAK

WHEN: May 1, Wednesday

CAST: Chinawut Indracusin, Vachiravit Paisarnkulwong, Bhuripat Vejvongsatechavat, Witthawat Rattanaboonbaramee, Jannine Weigel

WHERE: Cathay Cineplexes, Eng Wah Cinemas

bryanlim@asiaone.com