Educating your kids on sex: Is 1 sex talk enough?

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As parents, one of the biggest mistakes you might make is thinking that one sex talk with your children is enough. In truth, you need to prepare your kids to face the real world with more than one conversation about the said topic.

When it comes to intimacy, it’s best to initiate more than one sex talk with your children. Sex is one of the essential parts of being human. It is not just about you, but it also involves more than the physical act of intercourse with another human. Because of this, you must discourage your kids from feeling ashamed of saying the word “sex”.

It could affect how we feel about ourselves and impacts our important choices as men and women. As adults, you fully understand what sex entails.

Unfortunately, it will not always be easy to talk about it with your kids. Developing a healthy understanding of sex and a good conversation with your child can never be as easy as one, two, three. Plus, the topic often makes them feel awkward.

Sometimes, conversations with the kids about this matter can be overwhelming. However, your child may ask you questions that they probably encountered during conversations with their friends. 

Since they are at the age to start getting curious about specific information, it could now be your perfect opportunity as a parent. It would be best if they could gain accurate information and that it comes from you.

Why should I talk to my kids about sex?

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Talking with your kids about sex is essential for developing a healthy attitude toward sex. Aside from that, they also need to learn how to be responsible about sex.

As a parent, you can provide accurate information about sex if you can openly discuss it with your child. Keep in mind that what they learn elsewhere will not always be accurate. The information they absorb will always affect their perspective, actions, and behaviour. 

It is your duty as a parent to educate them on the consequences of being sexually active. It includes pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and all of the emotional effects that come with sexual relationships. 

Talking to kids about sex will not always make them want to do it

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Research shows that teens who discussed sex with their parents are more likely to wait longer before having sex. They are also more likely to use contraception. Though it may seem good that they’re practising safe sex, it’s bad that they also seem scared of the act.

Children need to understand sexual feelings and relationships. It is something that they must be knowledgeable about before engaging in sex. Plus, it’s not something they should be afraid of in the future.

7 tips to remember during a sex talk with your children

  • Don’t wait too long to start talking about sex

Adults, especially parents, should begin talking about sex earlier. You may start it with a conversation about sex and sexual health to ensure that your children get accurate information. 

A child is never too young to talk about certain aspects of sex. You are the best teacher to teach them basic lessons for good sexual relationships. 

  • Pass down wisdom instead of trauma

Negative sexual experiences aren’t always the result of bad decision-making. Remember that trauma is not only limited to assault. People can also experience trauma through words and attitudes from someone, their loved ones. 

Consider how you wish your family would have handled situations of talking about sex. In that way, you can facilitate more open lines of communication with your kids.

  • Have more than one sex talk

You cannot avoid feeling awkward when talking about sex as a family. However, bear in mind that it does not have to be weird. 

Experts recommend parents use everyday occurrences as the opportunity to listen to kids. Use every opportunity to know what they are thinking and processing to make conversation about sex more dialogue than a lecture.

ALSO READ: How parents should talk to their children about sex

  • Don’t forget that your kids will do their own research

As parents, you must ensure that your children know where to get reliable information without talking to you. Introduce them to trustworthy and easy-to-use websites. 

  • Help your paediatrician promote your child’s sexual health

Remember that it is not only parents who struggle to discuss sex with young people. Doctors are also having a hard time explaining sexual health to their young patients. According to a survey, the youngest sexually active female patients felt most awkward talking about their sexual history. 

It is essential to make it easier for your child’s doctor to have these important conversations with your child. Don’t interfere if your child’s doctor wants to speak with him or her privately.

  • Discuss biology and safe practices without forgetting about feelings and values

Experts often encourage parents to remind their children about the importance of condoms and contraception. Plus, don’t scare them about pregnancies and let them know the good that comes with intercourse.

This article was first published in theAsianparent.