Thanks to Covid-19, I've spent more time apart from my boyfriend than together

With the circuit breaker in full swing, some people may find it extremely difficult to be apart from their significant other for two months. Sad to say, this has been the norm for me since last year.

Towards the end of my university life in Australia, my boyfriend and I got together. A few weeks later, I had to fly back to Singapore permanently, while he stayed in Australia for a year to complete his studies.

Thus began our year-long long distance relationship (LDR).

After he graduated last December, he flew back to Singapore and we could finally see each other in person. What a blissful four months it was, until circuit-breaker kicked in.

So just like that, we're back to the usual – Skyping, oh wait, I mean Zooming each other at least once a week.

Thanks to the coronavirus pandemic, I've spent more time apart from my boyfriend than together in our 21 months together.

While this circuit-breaker period might have changed the relationship between some couples and how they date, nothing's really new for me – except an extension of not seeing my boyfriend in person.

Granted, my boyfriend and I aren't exactly social beings in the first place, so when we did get to meet up before, we'd either find an affordable place to have a meal or watch shows on Netflix together at either of our homes.

Same same but different

However, if there's one thing I can be grateful for now, it's that we are actually in the same country, and in the same time zone.

No more feeling bad about him staying up late because in Australia he was always two hours ahead of me, and now there's no more waiting for two weeks before he receives my parcels from Singapore.

Now, I can just surprise him with a meal via food delivery services that will reach him within an hour, without incurring an overseas call charge – when the delivery person can't find his house.

How other people date

Unlike my lack of creativity in the art of dating, some friends of mine have found different ways of spending time with their partners during this period.

Kyna Ng, 22, works out twice a week with her boyfriend over video call and occasionally, they sing karaoke together on an app called Quan Min Party. Verified and tested, the app is surprisingly quite a fun substitute for an in-the-flesh karaoke party.

Another friend, Jasmine Gan, 30, conducted a painting session with her boyfriend via Skype. If anyone's interested, here's a video they used to try out a colouring technique together.

[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnynI7xUKRo&feature=youtu.be&app=desktop[/embed]

Who knows, you might even discover a new talent!

I was also inspired by Joanna Low, 23, who took the dating game online to Club Penguin, a multiplayer online game that uses cartoon penguin-avatars as playable characters. I forced my boyfriend to create an account just for kicks. FYI, our game never materialised but we both still have our accounts.

If Club Penguin is not for you, another option is the currently trending Animal Crossing simulation video game, where couples can also meet virtually.

As much as we are encouraged to stay home as much as we can, when the longing to see each other in the flesh gets too much however, I've heard of dating couples who 'bump' into their partners whilst at the supermarket, or when cycling or jogging.

Of course, they said that they took care to practise safe social distancing, keeping at least one metre apart.

Don't take things for granted

This coronavirus situation has taught me not to take things for granted.

Even little gestures like asking how your partner's day was or sending a photo of what you're doing help to keep each other connected.

For example, Joanna told me she was touched that her boyfriend made the effort to send her food whenever she told him she was hungry. She said: "Since he can't do it personally, he will search for my favourite food and have it delivered."

As she aptly puts: "It's interesting to be virtually dating. If not for this circuit breaker, we wouldn't have had the experience."

[[nid:484504]]

However, according to Seow Guan Wen, 29, it can get quite frustrating as well, especially after the circuit breaker was extended to June 1.

"It's really like a LDR – although we are living in Singapore, we can't see each other physically," he said.

To tide through this period, he would eat together with his girlfriend via video call. Occasionally, they would also buy each other lunch or dinner, surprising the other party with their food choices.

While you and your partner may not be artistically-inclined to work on paintings together or even cook together during video chats like some people, it's fine to just keep the camera screen on and go about your day (as long as you have Wi-Fi).

After all, it's not about how you spend your time but who you choose to stay connected with.

trining@asiaone.com