6 reasons why you shouldn't rush into marriage
PUBLISHED ONOctober 07, 2016 2:22 AMByFizah Hatman
Are you rushing into marriage at an early age just because you think it's the right thing to do in Singapore? Being a 23-year-old living in Singapore, I'm starting to receive wedding invitations and seeing people get engaged on my Facebook timeline.
While this bunch of friends seem to have their lives sorted out, there are those who are still being questioned by their grandmas and grandpas on when it's their turn to get married.
Then it got me thinking, nobody should feel like they have to rush into a marriage. In times of doubt, never rush into things. Same goes with marriage.
We at GET.com have narrowed down 6 reasons why you shouldn't rush into marriage, because we know things can get messy if you do. If you're feeling pressured to tie the knot then maybe this article could be good for you.
1. You Don't Have Enough Money
This is the most cliche of all cliches and for good reason. As much as we hate to admit it, if you don't got the money, you can't get the honey.
First of all, the celebration for the wedding itself is going to cost money (here you can see the real cost of a wedding in Singapore).
But people tend to forget that the marriage itself is going to cost money too.
For example, do you even have enough to buy your first HDB flat? Maybe if you haven't really given money much thought, you can start by reading these 4 ways to manage your money as a couple in Singapore.
2. You Just Started Working
Are you happy with your job? If you've only been working for six months or even a full year, who's to say that this is the job that you want to be in for the rest of your life (or long term).
Things can change very quickly in a span of just one year, and if you're still grappling with not knowing what you want to do with your life, then investing your time and effort into thinking about a wedding is not going to do you any good.
Should you want to make a career move, you should also be able to do it without having to weigh anybody down.
3. You're Having Doubts
This can apply to the partner you're currently with or even yourself.
Yes, sometimes it's normal to have some doubts about your partner especially when you think about being with them for the rest of your life, but if your doubt runs deeper than that (aka trust issues), then a marriage could potentially make things worse.
On the other hand, if you still feel like you could be out there playing the field (and there's nothing wrong with that) then settling down in the near future might not be the best idea for you.
4. You're Doing It Because Everyone Else Is Doing It
Okay, I know this sounds ridiculous, but I have personally come across people who suffer from a bad case of FOMO (fear of missing out, if you missed the memo) to the point that they're willing to rush their boyfriends or girlfriends into getting married. This is just a big fat no.
If you know someone who acts this way, or if you are said someone, only you know how you're feeling inside, so if you do feel like you're wanting to get married for the wrong reasons, then take a minute to stop and think about what you really want out of a marriage.
5. You Still Make Things About You
Have you ever been told off by your friends that you're always making things about you? Or has your boyfriend or girlfriend told you that you're selfish and self-centred?
I know it hurts to hear that, but if you feel like there's some truth in that then maybe getting married isn't the best for you right now.
In a marriage, everything you do will have repercussions that will inevitably affect your spouse, and sometimes, you're going to have to prioritise your spouse first.
It's okay if this scares you, at least now you're aware and you can start working on yourself before getting hitched.
6. You're Just Not Mentally Ready
If you're anything like me and the thought of having to take care of someone else is more of a burden than a beautiful thing, then maybe you just have to accept the fact that right now, you're just not ready to get married.
Think about it, jumping into it when you're obviously not equipped mentally and emotionally is only going to do more damage than good to you and your spouse.
On top of that, you're going to have to deal paying your own bills and dealing with money problems along the way and if you're just ready for it, your state of mind can affect your finances quite badly.
Of course, you have to take everything with a pinch of salt. There are people out there who are more capable of handling a marriage than others.
At the end of the day, you have to be honest with yourself, if you really think you're ready to get married then nothing can really change your mind.
But if you're still struggling to figure out if you're ready for marriage or not, then take your time.
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