PUBLISHED ONAugust 25, 2025 10:55 AMBYChing Shi JieBertrand Lim’s daughter was just seven years old when she came home from school one day distraught and in tears.
Horrified, the 51-year-old realtor probed further, and found out his only child was bullied by four male classmates throughout her entire first year in primary school.
“She was punched in the stomach on the bus. In the second week of school someone used a sharp object to cut her arm,” said Lim in an interview with AsiaOne on Aug 23 (Saturday), adding that he lodged a complaint to the principal, who had his daughter transferred to another class.
Lim said that his daughter, now 11, had since taken up taekwondo as “she realised that she does not want to be bullied”.
But four years on, her mental scars have not healed.
“Just two weeks ago, we were sitting in a Grab ride… and she related her experiences (of being bullied),” he said. “It goes to show a child carries them growing up.”
Lim was one of several concerned parents who spoke to AsiaOne in the wake of the bullying incident at Sengkang Green Primary School.
Three students were suspended over death threats made to a classmate, and one of them was caned.
The Ministry of Education (MOE) on Aug 20 released a timeline of events, in which it said there was a series of squabbling and verbal exchanges between a Primary 3 female student and her three male classmates since the beginning of the year.
On July 25, MOE said that the girl requested her form teacher to change her seat after two of the male students had used inappropriate language on her, and that another had touched her face without consent.
“As she had admitted to using inappropriate language to students A and B, the three students were guided to apologise to each other and focus on mending their friendship”.
But in an earlier Facebook post by the girl’s mother on Aug 14, which first put the incident in the spotlight, she said that her daughter had been “persistently bullied” by the three students in her class for almost six months.
According to MOE’s “tiered approach to handling bullying and hurtful behaviour” on its website, schools guide students to “resolve their differences and reach a common understanding” for cases arising from careless remarks and misunderstandings.
But Lim wants schools to be firmer in their approach to protect victims from their bullies.
“Let’s not be utopian. We can learn to get along, but let’s not talk about restoring friendships,” he said. “I think that is a very silly notion.”
Private tutor Edwin Tan, 38, said that he understands the school has to teach children “it’s okay as long as you realise your mistakes, we can all forgive each other”, but does not agree with teachers “acting as peacekeepers to hope for the best”.
“But I don’t think it works for teenagers that way," said Tan, who has been a teacher for 15 years.
He said: “Some adults can shake hands because they have a higher degree of maturity and self control, which is uncommon in teenagers. They usually act on impulse and based on peer influence.
”The victim and the bullies should have been separated. At least in the interim measure until both parties have been counselled and informed not to agitate each other.”
Han Meiqi, an ex-primary school teacher and now runs parenting courses as the founder of Thrive at Schools, said that when bullying happens, schools should act immediately to ensure the victim feels safe.
“That means separating the students involved, listening to the child’s experiences without judgement and reassuring them that they are protected,” said Han.
The mother of the student who was bullied claimed that despite reporting the death threats to the school on July 26, the same student attacked her daughter on Aug 1.
“We sent an email to the school to express our concerns as the retaliation continued,” she said. “But the school did not reply to our emails.”
In response, MOE said on Aug 20 that the school CCTV footage showed that the teacher did not witness the incident, and that the boy was caned on Aug 12.
The ministry added that the school had engaged the parents of the students on various occasions and informed them of the action taken, as well as a safety plan for the affected student.
Several parents and experts in the teaching industry defended the school’s actions, and called for more support for teachers to deal with bullying incidents.
“How fast do parents expect the teacher to respond?” asked 40-year-old Gina, a mother of two who declined to give her last name.
If her child were to be bullied, she said, she would want frequent updates from the school outlining the steps being taken to address the situation.
Private tutor Tan, meanwhile, said it could be difficult for teachers to get a hold on discipline issues when they are managing a class of 20 to 30 students.
“Every student has a different pattern. Sometimes it’s very difficult to pick up between normal teenage interactions or those with malicious intent,” he said.
“Name calling, using abusive language… it is very common. It could be very difficult for teachers to say, ‘this looks potentially like a bad bullying case’. So they will take a wait and see approach.”
Tan said that going forward, he hopes to see “specialists” in schools — much like the role of discipline masters and counsellor — to advise teachers on red-flag interactions between students.
James Lim, director of programmes at Lutheran Community Care Services, a registered charity in Singapore for troubled youth and their families, called the bullying case in Sengkang Green Primary “exceptional”.
“I have not seen a nine-year-old make death threats and use such sophisticated methods to anonymise the whole act,” he said.
Echoing the need for more support for form teachers, he said that there should be another dedicated staff member involved in direct communications with parents when it comes to serious bullying cases.
It can be another level head or school counsellor, who is trained in handling sensitive communication, so that parents feel “heard, understood and supported”.
“I think it’s very important to be proactive in communication and be transparent with one another as much as possible. To establish trust between parents and schools at the beginning,” said Lim.
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chingshijie@asiaone.com
